Empowering Messages from the Super Buck Moon

I often wonder how the Full Moons will affect me and others around me. We hear of Full Moons bringing out the lunatic in some people or others going on violence sprees. But what if a Full Moon helped us to resolve our anger by each of us confronting our feelings and the truths we face in our lives?

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For those of us who already practice mindfulness meditations or mindfulness in general, we are more able to face those truths, sometimes, ugly truths. We know that emotions come and go like waves. We know that we don’t need to hang on to our anger, sadness, or grief. And I believe the Buck Moon on July 13 (just passed), also a Super Moon, helps us to empower ourselves, if we choose to follow our own inner authority and release any victim mentality or drama.

Capricorn is a sober sign. It also happens to be the sign of the city where I’m currently residing (but hoping to leave soon), Brattleboro, Vermont. But the Capricorn energy here is repressed and overpowered by the energy of Vermont’s Pisces Sun. People here confuse codependence with compassion and end up killing people slowly and softly with kindness that isn’t genuine kindness but helplessness (shadow side of Pisces and Capricorn).

It’s as if the Capricorn energy here is repressed because people don’t want to be seen as ambitious or as social-climbers (leave that to the Bostonians and New Yorkers). This Cardinal Earth energy wants to bust out and start something new but can’t because it’s repressed in traditional ways of thinking and overwhelmed with the societal ills the city faces, and has faced for decades. Except now the blank is hitting the fan. Solutions that worked in the past no longer suffice and that’s because of an influx of the drug epidemic that has swept across the entire country and reared its head in the Green Mountain State.

Neither progressive nor conservative policies resolve this problem and part of that problem is that there never was a real war on drugs as far as the federal government. There were no gatekeepers protecting consumers from legal drugs the pharmaceutical companies hand out, especially in the form of addictive pain killers, which in the end cause more suffering and even death to too many. And as far as, illegal drugs entering the country, look no further than exposes written on this topic in the past.

But that’s not what this post is about. I’m writing this post because I need to process my anguish because of the assumptions locals have made about me; and their resentment towards me. Since arriving in Brattleboro all the locals have done is to tell me that there is no housing here. This is true but people are living in houses and apartments that I walk by every day. What they mean to say is we mismanaged growth in our city and we didn’t believe that Americans would move to this locale from other states (and damn if they do). They have said that I have no right to move here and contribute to their economy by living and working in this community. Well, thank you for that warm Vermont welcome.

And as a US citizen doesn’t that give me the right to live in the state and city of my choice?

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I had a conversation online with a woman who moved here from Massachusetts and she said that if I want to find permanent housing in this city, I would need to get to know the locals first by volunteering in the community. She mentioned that it took her five years to find a permanent apartment. That’s too long to wait for a home. Where did she live in the meantime, on someone’s couch or in a tent? And who has time to volunteer in a community when they have to work to pay the cost of hotel rooms or search for a weekly rental while still searching for a permanent home while the savings account dwindles? Sorry, but that’s insane.

Another in person conversation with a local was that people are acting cold and indifferent to me because they believe that I showed up only to abuse the social services in the community. Yet, the people who moved here to abuse the social services (mostly people addicted to substances or people who are used to living off the system which I’m sure the Great Reset will take care of them) are rewarded for their behaviors. Even when they stand stoned holding up a sign in a grocery store parking lot, people hand them cash. Why? These people who are stoned are going to spend someone’s hard-earned money on more drugs. And yet, I’m the problem?

And sadly, those drugs will eventually kill people so these kind folks aren’t doing anyone a favor. I admit in this regard, I’m not among the kind people. I would rather donate my money to another professional seeking a home so he or she can get back to work. That’s my Capricorn Rising Sign speaking up. And I think Capricorn Sun people would agree with me. Capricorns believe in taking responsibility for oneself but also asking for help when it is truly required. And even then, a Capricorn feels humiliated to ask for help.

Well, here’s the truth of my situation. Since arriving in Brattleboro the first week of April, I have spent several thousand dollars from my savings on temporary housing. Yep, that’s right. And doing this while I’ve not been able to work because I wasted time like someone from a Quixotic episode looking for a permanent home, when the locals are too resentful towards me even if they had a home to rent to me. And only today was someone brave enough to tell me this to my face. The Buck Moon is bringing out other people’s assumptions or what they perceive as truth.

My parents, friends, and colleagues have also shelled out money on my behalf to keep me off the streets or in a dreaded homeless shelter with substance abusers and who knows who else. Perhaps, that sounds judgmental or ignorant like I was told by one social service manager, but who among you would willingly stay in a drop-in homeless shelter in a city with a substance abuse epidemic? Yet, people don’t have a problem sending me there. Thanks a lot for your fake kindness. Yes, you do wish me harm and your indifference proves that.

Whereas I spent thousands of dollars in this community, I wished that I had saved money and spent my money online. Then the local businesses and the food coop could launch complaints against me. As it is, I’m a shadow worker which means that I see dark forces at play. I see where people lie to themselves and gaslight others. I have been scapegoated many times during this lifetime and probably previous ones. I don’t enjoy shadow work but it’s one of the roles I play. I’ve been playing that role to the hilt in Vermont and it’s not something I expected to happen when I landed here. I had other plans. Not this.

The Buck Moon on July 13 turns us all into shadow workers since the Full Moon casts shadows. And this particular Moon in Capricorn asks us to face our shadows and to take responsibility for our wounds. And this is where the empowerment comes in. It is about facing and speaking the truth, but that truth is uncomfortable and most people will try to avoid it. They squirm. They try to run away. But they won’t get far before the truth shines its light in their eyes. Actually, that’s a good thing. Embrace it. That’s the Universe’s way of being cruel to be kind.

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There’s that saying that the truth shall set us free. I believe that it will set us free and then it’s up to us to claim our rights as sovereign beings. Jesus once taught us also to forgive our enemies and this is something I haven’t understood fully until now. This is because people only know what they know. They follow a set of rules and live in limitations because they were programmed over time to live that way.

And in response to the social services manager, of course, I’m ignorant because otherwise I would be enlightened. That makes the mass majority of us ignorant because hardly anyone is enlightened and certainly not the folks who brag about being enlightened. I realize that I’m as faulty as anyone else. I have my quirks. I know what I know intuitively too but I can’t articulate it without getting tongue tied or as one woman said about me on the bus, “Don’t listen to her, she has foil wrapped around her head.”

And so I end my long and windy essay on the Buck Moon. I wish I had something more pleasant to share like the beauty of this Moon or that deer showed up in my parents’ garden in Washington State. So bright and happy experiences are equally true as the darkness we face at this time. But even some of the dark stuff we face is fabricated illusions to keep us stuck in fear. When we are paralyzed by fear we are more easily controlled. That’s the opposite of empowerment.

So face your truth and stand in it. Empower yourself and claim your divine right as a sovereign being. And if you must, howl at the Buck Moon, even in places you wish you weren’t residing.

If you enjoyed this essay or at least gleaned some truth for yourself, DONATE. Your donation will help me relocate to Montpelier where I hope to reboot my life. Thank you for your generous support. Tipping the creator leads to good karma.


2 thoughts on “Empowering Messages from the Super Buck Moon

  1. People who are that close minded are living at the poverty level of consciousness. It’s all about the fear that there won’t be enough to go around. The ignorance is bone chilling. You have experienced it first hand. All of this is going to make you even stronger. You have great insight spiritually and see it clearly.

  2. Thank you, Cynthia for your observations. There are vortexes of poverty consciousness and the programming that goes along with it. People can break free of it, but it takes effort.

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