Intuitive Coaching 101–The Art of Graceful Expansion

On N. State Street photo by Patricia Herlevi

On N. State Street
photo by Patricia Herlevi

Often we mistake expansion for self-sabotage. We manifest our dream relationship, dream home, or the perfect job and then one day we find ourselves griping about Mister Right not being so right, or the job not paying enough. Aren’t we worth more? And what’s really happening is that we expanded our consciousness and sense of self so we’re ready to move on if only we allowed it.

So what are the signs we have reached the expansion phase?

  • We feel like someone ripped off our rose-colored glasses
  • The dream situation loses its luster
  • We find ourselves growing bored with the situation or relationship
  • The grass looks greener somewhere else
  • Our priorities change as do our perceptions
  • We gripe about the job
  • We nick pick about our partner
  • We have a sense that it’s time to move on but fear change

Often we experience expansion when we work with spiritual tools and practices. We attend a spiritual workshop thinking nothing occurred because we didn’t experience buzzing in the crown chakra or the euphoria everyone else mentioned. That’s what I call subtle expansion. We also experience expansion at certain times during our life cycle and astrological transits play a part. Natural expansion occurs at ages 2, 5, 7. 12, 13-19, 21, 28 -30, 44-45, 50-56, 58-60 and so on. Don’t be alarmed for the transitions that occur during those ages. It’s natural and happens to all of us.

Instead of calling your feelings, fears, and actions a form of self-sabotage, consider that your soul entered an expansion period and desires new experiences. Authors such as Thomas Moore who wrote “Care of the Soul” for example, mentioned that the soul is the true driver in our lives, not the mind and not the physical body. And it’s often during the expansion phases that people flock to new age or metaphysical tools and teachings. We grab self-help books of the library or bookstore shelves hoping we’ll find solace for the uneasiness that grips us for months or even years until we listen to the whispers of our souls.

Be easy and gentle with yourself. Give yourself space to grow and allow the new you to unfold naturally. Take time to meditate, go for walks, and spend time alone in contemplation. Get in touch with your soul through creative expression such as writing in journals, sketching, painting, writing poetry, or performing. Take up new hobbies that interest you or take a class. Pick up books with topics that suddenly interests you and follow the threads of synchronicity.

My favorite image of expansion, although somewhat cliche, is the worm transforming into a butterfly than shoving its way out of the cocoon. I also see an image of a child’s feet growing and requiring a bigger pair of shoes. Expansion causes us alarm because it often asks us to explore the forbidden and sometimes we scapegoat others for attracting us into affairs and ruining our “stable” marriages. True, temptation rears its head during expansion phases, but if we pay attention to the true yearnings of our souls and stop looking for escape routes such as love affairs, fast cars, or drunken binges, we avoid the crisis.

Finally, expansion shows up under numerous guises. The marriage ends. We’re fired from a job that became a career. Our children leave home earlier than expected, or we’re forced to relocate to another home, or city, or even country. Often we give these situations other meanings or more meaning than they deserve when our souls just want a change of scenery, players, and plot.

I’m an author, astrologer, photographer, and intuitive coach who gives intuitive coaching sessions to artists and entrepreneurs. I also practice Transformational, Practical, and Pediatric Astrology free of archetypes. Sign up for sessions or readings at Metaphysics for Everyday Living. I’m currently writing my 5th novel and accepting art patrons at