Intuitive Coaching 101–Take Responsibility for Your Happiness



Oh, your friend wails, “I don’t have a choice!” Not true, we always have a choice. We can always choose love instead of fear.  True, fear has more drama attached to it and we garner an audience of sympathetic folks until we suck them dry of their sympathy.  But Love has no drama attached to it and often feels like a thorn in our side temporarily.

I am remembering song lyrics, “I did it for love…” I don’t recall the name of the torch song and I’m sure the lyrics were actually dramatic and tear drenched since that’s what torch songs do.  But here’s a hint to what love looks like.  Love doesn’t stick around in abusive relationships trying to fix what is broken.  Love doesn’t put others first at our own detriment. Love is not about sacrifice, crosses, and martyrs.  Love is not “He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother,” that’s just sentimental nonsense that’s hard on the tear ducts. Love leads us on a path to ultimate happiness. Love asks us to live our lives big, not play small.  Love allows us to choose mind and heart expansiveness instead of attracting situations that close our hearts.

So in that regard, we each have the task of taking responsibility for our thoughts, our actions, our emotions, the words we use and the energy we release in the world.  Instead of blaming or shaming others, we take responsibility for any role we play that brings more chaos to the world. We might think we’re not contributing to GMO foods, or some other issue of the day.  We might think we don’t contribute to climate change, but with every negative word, thought, judgement, or action, we contribute to the chaos, pain and suffering in the world.

The problem revolves around people thinking that they’re powerless, small and insignificant.  Not true.  If a butterfly flapping her delicate wings in Tokyo can cause a hurricane in Louisiana (an example), then don’t you think that your thoughts, actions, words, and feelings affect the rest of the world? Two things we must remember: One, we all matter and two, we all contribute.  The question is are we taking responsibility for our part or do we spend our time blaming a corporation or government leader for our misery.

As someone who has been unemployed, I have met many unemployed people. They blame the economy for their woes, but at the same time reveal poor communication habits and a negative attitude.  Instead of focusing on positive happenings in the world, they watch the news where they hear more about the bad economy further perpetuating their negative situation.  But if the Law of Attraction is real and I believe that it is, then we get more of what we place our focus upon.  Not less, but more.

This brings us to another question.  How do we solve those problems by ignoring them? The LOA teachers aren’t telling us to ignore problems but to stop worrying, fearing, and limiting our capacity for solutions.  By getting our mind off those problems and focusing on the positive, solutions do appear out of left field.  But sitting around a table or a think tank talking world problems to death hasn’t solved any of them. The experts and their analysis and their analysis of their analysis have not solved any problems, and in fact, they have just made the problems worst with their intense focus.  They even have negative mantras such as “Climate change is a reality.”

I think you know what I’m getting at here.  So instead of joining angry activists, who by the way, focus too intensely on the problem, look at the ways each of us contribute to the chaos in the world! Using vulgar language for instance causes pain and suffering because of the dark frequencies.  Not taking responsibility tells the Universe that we want more of the same poison, drama, and chaos.  Sure, just send us more because we enjoy the adrenaline rush and the feeling of self-righteousness. It’s a fun game to find a scapegoat whether that’s a corporation or president.  That way we get to look like the good guys here in the wild, wild West.  We’re wearing the white hats, haven’t you noticed?

I don’t mean to come down hard on activists since I’ve joined many causes in the past.  But I never joined them out of love or passion. I joined them out of outrage and anger, which is basically choosing fear over love.  Then soon after, I felt sucked dry and burnt out and at war with the world.  That type of lifestyle leads to premature aging and disease.

And I’ve played the role of the person who speaks about spirit at activists meetings with people either ignoring me, shunning me or treating me like I’m just a naive girl.  Oh, there she goes with that Law of Attraction stuff.  But I don’t believe in simplistic mantras such as “you create your reality” which I find banal and ill-informed.  We all together create this reality by choosing fear because in some respect we enjoy the adventure and maybe the adventure we seek is a spiritual quest.

Choosing love isn’t easy.  There are many dragons to battle, and many obstacles in the way.  I enjoy myths and legends, but the journey we take now is of the heart.  Choosing love means that we take responsibility for our own well-being.  We empower ourselves and walk the high road even if everyone else chooses the low road.  It means we spend a lot of time alone like a hermit because it’s better than hanging out with drama queens and kings who don’t take responsibility for themselves.  And the truth is there are no victims here, just the lies we tell ourselves so we can fit in and get with the false program.

If we don’t like others lying to us, then let’s stop lying to ourselves by playing small and acting like we don’t make a difference.  Every single choice we make moment to moment contributes to healing or chaos.  Oh, yes, we are that powerful.  We all matter and so do our so-called insignificant choices.  But that juice you choose, that second glass of wine, that cigarette, that driving a car instead of taking public transportation or riding a bike or choosing not to watch the news, matter.  Will we ever know to what extent? Probably not.

Still when we choose love we feel lighter, more free and happy.  Maybe not right away, but eventually.  Let’s stop the lies, games and subterfuge and be real with ourselves and each other.  When The Beatles sang “All We Need is Love,” they spoke sage wisdom.  And when Bob Marley sang, “Emancipate Yourself from Mental Slavery,” he meant liberate yourself from self-oppression and not the governments we judge.  In fact any time we judge another, we become the slave of who or what we judge.  And that will never lead to happiness.

One thought on “Intuitive Coaching 101–Take Responsibility for Your Happiness

  1. ” Love asks us to live our lives big, not play small” What a great line. LIke what you said about “insignificant choices” and activists. What’s hard is taking the real meaning of songs/life when the surface ones are so much easier

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